Carol Kroll

Notes To Self

So I am currently working on a Flash animation for one of my tunes. And last night I started writing lyrics for a new song. And I think it is March and its madness, but I am having trouble focusing on ONE thing because there are seriously many pieces to this whole “thing” I am doing currently. Marrying all parts of myself for a common goal? I want it all done, all facets, now.

But I must remind myself constantly that it’s not the destination. It really is the journey, so enjoy the discoveries (joyous and disheartening) along the way. Not fight it or feel like what you are doing doesn’t matter. Putting the positive line of thinking into practice day to day is quite a challenge. But my alternative is to go back to staring out the window of my kitchen and feeling like cutting the grass every Wednesday is my only option in life. That is the true scary place to be. Complacency. And I was there in the thick of it 2 years ago. And had been for, well, years I think. Just last May, I realized my soul was sort of crying out for help and finally have started listening.

So I refuse to feel like what I am doing currently doesn’t matter, because it does. I feel like that sometimes when I am making my things. Like why do this? What is the point? But I know it is a distraction. It doesn’t matter how many people support you with kind words and props (though it kinda does help justify what you are doing).

YOU have to believe it and trust it.

You know, trust and believe in yourself.