Whoooooooo boy, spring is currently kicking my ass mentally and emotionally. It’s a hard thing to try to explain that early spring is incredibly dicey for me especially while everyone else in the sane world is ecstatic about its arrival. The best way I can describe it is that everything suddenly gets VERY LOUD which also includes the GLARING SUNLIGHT and it's somewhat painful. Migraines revisit again due to the barometric pressure, mania revisits which sounds productive, but isn’t - it feels like I have seasonal depression in reverse and I’ve noticed it gets a little more difficult each year as I get older. At least I now know this is what happens every March-April and can try to thwart it with better coping mechanisms than I have in the past, but those new coping mechanisms are really being tested this week. Really. Being. Tested. I’ve needed to lay low and have things dark and silent right now for however long this lasts for me this season.

Today’s studio closeup is a past work that unfortunately perished in the 2018 flood. Speaking of which, the flood PTSD has crept back in again and I know that’s not helping my general uneasiness lately. Spring equals rain so I’m sure you can imagine anxiety is pretty high. So instead of being angry with myself about all this, I’m trying a different approach this year and working on being kind and patient with myself. A good question to ask yourself is, “Would you talk to a friend the same way your internal dialogue is rolling along?” Yeah. Ouch.

Please enjoy this work from the past! Stay safe and please keep well.

Title: Contest
Year: 2001
Media: Acrylic and Collage on Canvas Board
Total Dimension: 6.5” x 8.5”